Here come the holidays. Every year they come back around. Will I do them differently this year?

Coming Around Again

Yes, they’re here. It’s holiday time and whatever the holidays mean to us has a significant impact on our experience of them. As they begin, let’s look at what our experience has been so far this year, has been in the past and what we want it to be this year. Consciously determining what we want our experience of the holidays to be puts us in the driver’s seat, rather than being subject to whatever happens around us.

Every year, there are certain things that happen for us during the holidays. It may be gathering with family and friends, selecting and giving gifts, celebrations or hectic days. Our memories of past holidays do not dictate what our experience of them will be this year. We have a say in what we do and do not do and it behooves us to exercise that say now, in the present moment. How will we choose to experience the holidays this year?

As the holidays progress, here are some things we can consider:

• What has worked in the past for us during the holidays that we want to happen again?
• What has not worked that we want to change?
• Who around us has influence on our experience of the holidays?
• What have we done in the past that we do not want to do again?
• What would we like to create this holiday season?

Recognizing Recurring Openings

Sometimes we do not see recurring Openings for what they are. It may be that they have become routine or so familiar for us that we are numb to them and just go through the motions. Recurring Openings are ones that come around again and again. They may vary a bit in nature each time but are essentially the same. They are steady and we do not have a lot of influence on whether they come or not. Just like the holidays.

The holidays are recurring Openings. They come each year and there are rituals, emotions and actions that come with along with them. There may be others we can identify – significant dates in our lives when we remember what happened on that day, annual performance reviews at work, a recurring holiday such as Memorial Day or a location that we pass frequently that brings up a recurring memory.

Why are they recurring Openings? Because they come around again and again in our lives and hold some kind of significance for us. They usually have a familiarity for us and may be Openings we have experienced since childhood. We may not have seen them as Openings before, but they are there. They give us a chance to relive them and, in the process, to choose how we will experience them each time.

A Chance to Look Again

Each year the holidays say to us, “how will you experience me this time?” They come charged with all kinds of emotions and experiences. Our experience of them may have been positive or negative or somewhere in-between. But our past does not inform the present. In each moment, we have choice of how we respond to and experience recurring Openings.

Recurring Openings are of a different nature than singular Openings, but they are benevolent. They let us try and try again. As we go through them, we gain in wisdom and familiarity. We may have a negative experience one year, but can set our resolve to experience them in a new way the next. They have gifts for us and allow us to grow. Their recurring nature helps us see the importance of the Openings they present to us each time they come around.

As we get familiar with recurring Openings, we can enter and handle them proactively. A dismal holiday does not define our next one. We can study our own reactions and gain from our insights. It is the recurrence that presents the Opening.